If Only. Two Words We Should Never Use

There are two words that cause us more grief and waste more of our time than any others. They are “IF ONLY”. We waste more time trying to change the “if only’s” we wish had done that we cannot move forward. First of all you can not change a thing that has already happened, no matter how many prayers you say, how many obscene words you say, or how much wishing you do. Once you say or do something you wish you had said or done a different way its to late. Below is an example I took from an old book I picked up to read. I am not pushing books to sell and doubt you could ever find this one, it is an old “dog eared” book I got from some yard sale or junk store. The name of it is, A Touch of Wonder, by Arthur Gordon. He describes it as a book to help people stay in love with life. Its just full of quotes and things that give you goose bumps, but here is the prime example .

A writer could not get his articles published. They just came back REJECT. He would say. IF ONLY that article had been sent in sooner, IF ONLY I had sent it to a different paper, IF ONLY had been longer or shorter and on and on. He finally was just hung up on his IF ONLY articles. He could not write a thing. He thought of committing suicide, but thought of his wife and children so he went to an old doctor friend after hours and just poured out his grief. The doctor listened and went and got three files of people who had came in feeling just like this man. The Doctor had him read the three files where these people were absolutely to the end of their rope and ready to end it. When he finished reading the doctor asked him what was the common thread(all the patients were completely different). The man did not know until the doctor pointed out that everyone was full of IF ONLY they had or had not done this or that. Once you get stuck there you cannot move forward, you are in the same position as being hung up on a speed bump in a parking lot. You cannot back up or move ahead. The doctor told him to never use those words again and it would all start to look different to him. He and the doctor left the office and the mans bus just went by. He missed it. His face got red, he got agitated and started to say IF ONLY WE HAD LEFT SOONER, but stopped and started to laugh and said. NEXT TIME I will either leave earlier or have a bus schedule and a huge weight was lifted from him and he had the courage to go home and really write articles. We are not failures when something we do is rejected or refused. It is just time to do it different.

Ever since I read that book I have looked at everything completely different, and I hope you do to. I felt it was worth sharing with independent readers for sure. /ll